Are You the Issue?

Sometimes the problem really is you. If you have trouble interacting with family, friends seem to be distancing themselves or time after time you keep thinking, “What is wrong with everyone?” then maybe it is time to self-reflect. Now of course, everyone has some days where these things apply, but if you feel like this more days than not and are continuously having problems with everyone else, then the problem is most likely you.

The first step in fixing the issue is recognizing that you are the issue. Maybe the problem is as small as feeling the need to judge others. Unfortunately, as humans, it is unavoidable to notice things you don’t consider normal for yourself, but what we can do is change the way we think about it. No matter how good your style might be or how amazing your music taste is, what works for you may not be favorable for others. You are not the golden standard for others to match and that is okay. Accepting the fact that others have different interests, upbringings or wants is a crucial step in becoming a more likable person. Or if this does not apply to you, the problem is deeper and ingrained into your personality. This requires more work and dedication for you to see it and apply the necessary steps to change it. This is especially hard, because no one can fix it for you. It’s a long road that you alone must take in order to fix your problems.
With recognising that you are the issue comes a lot of self-deprecating thoughts and emotions. You cannot change and become a better person without first accepting and loving yourself. This may take some time alone and a lot of thought, but the most important thing to remember is that coming to terms with yourself is not a fast process, but it is a slow practice. There is no light switch that comes on when you finally love yourself. It is commitment, perseverance and acceptance. In order to be a better person, accepting and loving yourself is a crucial step. You cannot spread love for others if you do not possess it for yourself.

Although this process seems lonely and hard, since the problem is you, the solution also begins with you. This means if you work hard enough, you can turn it all around and live your life for the better. This all begins with consciously choosing to change.